brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
