It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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