wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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