Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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