They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
