you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
