So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
