just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
