My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize
