Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
I forget how to act sober
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
