youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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