Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
