Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i can't believe i had my finger in that
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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