What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
