i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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