Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
