In the future we'll all be gay
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize