you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
