New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
