Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
PS: I just woke up from my shower
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
