I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
