i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Randomize
