Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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