i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
