It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
