marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Having a random hookup so left but love u
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
