I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
