My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
and she was petting her beer can
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Life is so much better after having sex.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Hippo gnu deer
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
