You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
