ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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