I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
It's no shave November. This is our time.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
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