...so i touched it.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
