i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
