I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
