Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
