i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
We have started to decorate penises.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
