Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
