Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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