once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize