You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
When did angry sex become our thing?
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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