He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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