so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
