WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Randomize
