the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Randomize
