Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
it's great music for shaving your balls
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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