Screwed.edu
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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