okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Randomize
