her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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