whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
