WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
